


I know your pain (except I really do)

by samdrake



Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Heartbreak, NSFW banter, Pain, Soulmates, Torture, War, pain sharing soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 11:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16196513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samdrake/pseuds/samdrake
Summary: As far as soulmates go, Jacob Seed isn’t exactly what The Deputy had in mind. But the pain they both feel is more than enough proof to make her bound to the eldest Seed brother. (Pain Sharing Soulmates AU)





	I know your pain (except I really do)

It was the unmistakable sound of wood against wood that woke you up. You felt like you’ve been kicked into next week and you were positive you looked like it too. It could be anything at this point to make you feel so terrible - a Peggie getting trigger happy, an unlucky spill on your ATV, or maybe even Jacob finally kept his word and caught up to you.

You wished it wasn’t the latter. You  _so_  wished it wasn’t the latter, but you were wrong. Your eyes opened to the face you’ve seen only twice in your life - once in the church where it all began, and the second time with those god damn “Only You” propaganda posters all over the damn mountains.

“Mornin’ sunshine,” he spoke sternly, his voice gruff yet low at the same time. He sat in a wooden chair inches away from you, except his hands weren’t tied to the armrests like yours. He was leaning into you with a hand gripping the seat. Even though he was sitting, you could tell he was tall. He has the type of build you knew would give you a run for your money in a fight.

“You must be Jacob,” your brows knitted together in an irritated scowl.

“You must be the Deputy killing all of my men,” you hinted the slightest bit of awe in his tone.

You cracked your neck out of its stiffness and smirked at him. “Were those your guys? You must not be training them too well. They were almost  _too_  easy to kill.”

Jacob didn’t like that. He grabbed the bottom of your seat, yanking you towards him in one swift motion. “Do you think you’re some kind of hero, Deputy?” he asked. “The weak always see themselves as heroes. No matter their cause, they think of themselves as warriors. But they’re not warriors. They’re children.”

He leaned back into his chair, letting it settle into your ears. “You can’t be more than… 23? 24 maybe? What’s a kid like you doing running around trying to save the world anyway?”

“And you’re like what, 80? What’s an old man like you doing killing half of the county anyway?”

His eyes burned into yours. “You’ve got a lot of banter in you, sweetheart. Good. That’ll keep things interesting. But I have a story for ‘ya that’ll quiet that pretty little mouth of yours.”

“Try me,” you said. Jacob nodded, accepting your challenge as he pushed his chair back with a slide of his foot against the floor. He stood up and waltzed toward the front of the room. It’s when you noticed how small the room you two occupied really is, perfect for close quarter torture.

“You’ve met my sister Faith, I presume?” he asked, his face towards the wall and his back to you. You’ve definitely met her, God rest her soul. “Of course you did. You’re the one who killed her. That’s okay, Joseph will find another one. He always does.” You shivered at the iciness in tone, the emotionless voice of a brother who didn’t care about his sister’s death.

“You went after her first, caused a lot of fucking damage. Thanks to you the Henbane is in control of the Resistance now. That’s okay, too. That won’t be for long. But while you were off playing ‘hero’, Deputy, I’ve learned a few things about you. A little bit about me, too.”

He pulled his knife out of his holder, hanging his head down as he played with it. “A few nights ago I was watching my men train as I usually do. Got this weird pain in my chest. Y’know, the kind of feeling you get when you knocked down. Didn’t think much of it. But then it kept coming, and the pain got worse. I actually had to excuse myself if you can believe it.”

“Sounds like you got your period to me.”

He scoffed at that, turning around to face you with a disapproving glare. “Don’t interrupt me… But it really does make you wonder. I was doing just fine, suddenly I’m excusing myself to deal with my pain in private like a wuss. Felt like I was getting attacked with a bunch of small knives. A few hours later I find out my sister is dead. I find out you killed her. And if I knew anything about my sister… or should I say, Rachel, is that she could put up a god damn fight when she wanted to.”

You remembered your fight with Faith clear as day. You still had no idea how she threw those hard-hitting magic balls of whatever at you, or if it was all just a bliss-infused dream.

He walked slowly towards you as he spoke. You had a feeling as to where he’s going with this, but the mere thought of it sounded fucking ridiculous. “I know what you’re thinking. No fucking way, huh? No way you’re my, uh…” You blinked at his loss of words. “But how is it possible that at the same time my sister is fighting the god damn Deputy, I’m getting my ass handed to me by…nothing?”

Your eyes rolled skyward at his accusation. No way Jacob is your soulmate. You didn’t know much about soulmates, and most of the time you were positive that absolutely nobody in this world is your perfect half. But Jacob Seed? Mr. Cull-The-Herd, Mr. Sacrifise-The-Weak? That’s the furthest thing from your perfect half.

Jacob rolled up his left sleeve and brought his knife to his hand. “So let’s settle this. If you really are my  _soulmate_ ,” the way he said it sounded like a curse word, “then this is going to hurt like a bitch.”

He sliced his hand right open, a small cut enough to heal in time but to hurt like a bitch. You knew it hurt like a bitch because it hurt you too. You slammed your hand down on the armrest and screamed at the stinging, but you’d live through the pain. It’s when you looked up at Jacob - his hand gushing with blood but his eyes were on you, wide eyes in his own shock - that you knew you were royally  _fucked_.

“Holy shit,” his mouth twitched, but he didn’t miss a beat. He pushed his chair out of the way and stood in front of you, the intensity of it causing you to jump. He leaned down, his face inches away from yours, and for the first time since properly meeting him, your eyes struggled to match his. “Who’d have fucking thought, huh?”

His blood dripped down on your jeans, his hands gripping the end of your armrests, the knife in his right hand digging into your skin but not cutting you. He was careful about that. “What’s that? No witty remarks? No banter? No shitty comebacks for me, Deputy?” he was absolutely enjoying this. “You can’t even look me in the eye.  ** _Am I scaring you?_** ”

“Get the fuck away from me,” you muttered, all of your confidence going straight out the window.

“Is that all you got sweetheart? Come on, you can do better than that.”

You really couldn’t. Sarcasm and wit was your ultimate defense in a verbal attack, but strapped to a chair by a sadistic cultist who just so happens to be your soulmate had a funny way of tearing your defense down.

“My family isn’t going to believe this,” he shook his head in wonder, “The little lamb, destined to bring the Collapse upon us. The locust in the garden is my damn soulmate. We’re destined by fate _,_ Deputy _._ ”

“I don’t give a shit about _fate_ , it doesn’t mean anything,” you lied, “you don’t seem very surprised, anyway.”

“I’ve seen too much in my life to be surprised by anything, Deputy. Consider me amused.” Jacob adjusted his postured, glancing down at the blood still dripping down your jeans as the stinging in both of your hands continued, “Deputy, what do you think makes us soulmates, huh? There must be something about us that makes us…  _compatible_.”

“Fuck you, we are  _nothing_  alike,” you said, stressing every word. The thought of being compatible with Jacob made your blood boil.

“So you think it’s out differences that makes us soulmates?” he pressed his lips together. “That’s a sweet idea. That our differences make us perfect for each other. Like predator and prey. Like a wolf hunting a lamb. Like a wolf hunting the lamb, so the lamb has to be stronger so it can learn to survive. Then the wolf learns to hunt better to catch the lamb.”

Stupidest metaphor ever. “Is that the best  _you_  can do?”

“You don’t like my metaphors, Deputy? You’re in for a long ride, sweetheart.”

“A long ride with what? With you?” you asked. “I take it you’re not letting me go, now that we’re destined, or whatever-the-fuck.”

“Deputy, I was never going to let you go. Soulmate or not. It’s always only ever you, after all…” Jacob smiled to himself, letting go of your chair, giving you room to breathe as he stood over you.  “Have you ever been in love, Deputy?”

“What do you know about love?”

“Nothing, not a damn thing. Most of the time I feel like love doesn’t even exist. But something interesting happened to me last year. Had a feeling it had something to do with my soulmate. Maybe you can fill in the blanks for me.”

Jacob stepped towards you and grabbed your shirt. He took his knife to your flannel and cut the sleeve right off before securing it back into his holster, wrapping it around his hand to stop the bleeding as he began his story. “About a year ago, give or take, I got this weird feeling inside of me. Something I’ve never felt before, something I didn’t like.” You couldn’t believe he was admitting to a weakness of his. “ Most days I didn’t want to leave my house. I snapped at anyone who even breathed the wrong way, just tore their god damn head off, literally. Got piss drunk - a lot. No reason at all. Just had this feeling that I wanted to. I was miserable, Deputy, can you believe it?”

One year ago. Something about his story made you know where this was going.

“Now I don’t know much about love, Deputy, but that felt like heartbreak to me. Emotional pain. Didn’t even think this soulmate shit went far enough to feel emotional pain, only physical, but shit, I know pain when I feel it. You were heartbroken.”

You didn’t want to think about it. Now you’re feeling it all over again, and you’re wondering if he can feel it too.

“Who broke your heart, Deputy?”

Staci Pratt. He tore your heart into pieces. You whispered his name in a barely audible tone.

“Ahh, Peaches, huh?” he raised an eyebrow at you. “You dated that weak little shit? And you came all this way to rescue him? Fuck Deputy, I pegged you all wrong.”

You didn’t come to save Staci, but Jacob would never believe it so you didn’t argue with him.

“What happened with him, did he find his soulmate?”

Your silence was his answer.

“Is it that other Deputy keeping my brother company?”

Your silence answered that question as well. He watched as your cheeks turned crimson with fury. At that moment, you hated Jacob more than you thought could be possible, but even more, you hated the feeling like you’re about to cry over something you’ve worked so hard to heal from, especially in front of him of all people.

Jacob knelt down in front of you. He brought his hand up to your face, gently moving your hair behind your ears. You hated how comforting it actually was, so you winced at his calloused touch. “I’m sorry.”

You looked up at him, unable to hide your shock. Since when did this man show sorrow? “You’re sorry?”

“You heard me,” he said. “I felt your pain. Literally. I didn’t like it. I’m  _sorry_.”

He apologized. Twice, even.  It wasn’t his fault but he apologized anyway. You didn’t believe it, but you needed to, so you did. Hearing those words come out of his mouth was exotic, but it comforted you. He knew your pain. It was strange but there wasn’t any denying of it.  You found solace in that.

His hand stopped at the base of your neck. His lips twisted into a devious smile, taking you in and sizing you up as he finally said, “Hey Deputy, do you think that if intense emotional pain can be felt by your soulmate… what do you think about intense  _pleasure_? Hmm?”

You gulped at that. And just like that, the tiny bit of comfort he gave you was gone. “I-I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Yeah?” he spoke softly. “I can see your lips twitching right now and I’m not even touching you.”

You didn’t even notice. Instinctively, you went to touch your lips, forgetting your hands were bound. He took the knife back out of his holster, and in a second the tip was pressed against your lip. “So sensitive, you are.” His pressed his knife against your throat, hard enough to feel pressure but without actually cutting you. “If I kiss that sweet spot on your neck right here, the one that’s making you all tense when I press against it, you think I would feel it too?”

Your breath hitched at that. You forgot how to breathe as he started tracing his knife down your chest, right in between your breasts. Jacob smiled at the muffled groan he got in response. “How about right here? Huh? Right in between your breasts, make you arch your back because it feels so good?”

You could almost feel it, and you hated yourself for it. Now you’re thinking about it, _picturing_ it, and the way he sucked against his bottom lip gave you the feeling that he knew exactly what he was doing. His knife made a beeline up and down your sides. “My hands clawing at your sides, making you arch your hips into me, watching you squirm at my touch.”

From your hips to your lower abdomen, he watched your cheeks turn crimson. “Atta girl. Getting nervous, are we? Don’t be nervous, sweetheart. I’ll teach you just the way I like it.”

His knife pressed harder into your abdomen. You could feel it press against your panties. He went further down. Further, further, further…  _oh, you son of a bitch_.

“What about here, Deputy? If I fuck you just the way you like, stuff you full of my cum, do you think you’d feel my pleasure on top of yours? Or do you think soulmates just fuck better anyways?”

You bit down on your bottom lip, forcing a whimper back. “I guess you’ll never know will you?”

If anything, that was a challenge in Jacob’s eyes. “We’ll see about that, sweetheart.”

Jacob took his knife off of you and stood up. He studied you for a moment, admiring the hot mess he made of you. “Training you will be hard. You won’t like it, you’ll hate me for it, more than you already do. It’ll hurt, I promise you that, but it’ll be worth it. You’ll be a perfect little soldier in no time.”

“Is that what they told you when you joined the army?”

In an instant, Jacob’s knife was pressed against your throat, and this time it wasn’t for pleasure. “Don’t you  _dare_  speak to me about something you know nothing about, Deputy. Or you won’t like what I do next.”

“ _Know nothing about_ , huh Jacob? Who the fuck do you think felt your pain all those years?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he pressed his knife harder against you.

“Your pain, the pain you felt in the war, you think you were the only one to feel that shit? I’ve felt it since I was born, Jacob.”

You didn’t mean to say it, but the words came tumbling out of your mouth and just wouldn’t stop. You’ve been thinking them since you found out Jacob was your soulmate. It all made sense, and you felt stupid for not realizing it sooner. The war wounds he was so clearly decorated in - the flesh burned off his skin, the cuts, the gunshots, the stab wounds - you felt them, all of them.

He took his knife off of you and took a step back. He stared at you with an unrelenting glare, waiting for you to say something,  _anything_.

“Your skin,” you said. “I was a child when that happened to you. One minute I’m in school, learning how to do math and the next minute I can physically feel my skin melting off. I couldn’t go back to school after that, not for years. And you know better than anyone that the wounds never stopped coming.”

Jacob stared at you dumbfounded. You can see it in his expression - for the first time in this whole encounter,  _he_  was the one who didn’t know what to say.

“I never knew much about soulmates. Just what I saw on TV - the romance, the tender kisses, the white-picket fence. So I didn’t understand when my parents told me that indescribable pain I felt was because of my soulmate. It took me years to understand that it. It took me even longer to understand that it wasn’t your fault.”

Jacob sucked in his breath as he wiped the sweat off his forehead.

“I don’t hate you because of what happened to you, I never hated you because of that.” There was an uncomfortable moment of silence that was way too loud for either of your likings. “I hate you because of the horrible things that you’ve done.”

Jacob stared at you with those piercing eyes that made your stomach turn every time they looked right into yours. Suddenly, he stepped forward and cut the tape off your wrists that were keeping you bound to the chair. He dropped the knife on the ground, the sound of metal clashing against the wooden floor making you jump.

He grabbed your hand and pulled you off of your seat. You crashed into him, the suddenness of being on your feet after sitting so long making you dizzy. He grabbed your arms to keep you steady, his hands started to run up and down your arms, his touch against your skin from the part of your shirt he cut off giving you goosebumps. His hands went up to your cheeks, cupping your face firmly in his hands.

“It’s a weird feeling, isn’t it Deputy? Knowing that someone’s felt the same pain as you.” he gave a content sigh, watching tears shimmer in your eyes. “Ahh, shhh. I’m not going to hurt you, sweetheart. Not anymore. I’ve done enough of that already. But it appears that you’re my soulmate, which means I have to  _love_ you. There won’t be any more suffering for you, sweetheart. You’ll be safe with me.”


End file.
